This isn’t going to be a regular blog post, but I thought I’d give everyone some updates on things going on in my life.
Snot & Tears Month has begun. I’ve had to start saying goodbye to friends already. I find myself welling up with tears at least once a day. One of my favorite people left for a couple of months, and so I won’t see her again until…? As my Spiritual Director has reminded me, saying goodbye, grieving these losses is very important. Telling people how much they mean to me is important. Hopefully I'll be able to get out the words!
Sunday, May 8 is going to be an emotional day. First of all, I’m being commissioned at all three worship services. To be commissioned is to be set apart for a task. It’s my church family sending me out to act on their behalf in the power and authority of Jesus. They are also going to have a reception for me in the morning. It’s lovely, yet I know it’s going to be hard.
Sunday, of course, is also Mother’s Day. My mom died in 1995, so the day is never easy. In His lavish goodness, God has provided many, many ‘adopted’ moms. He knew how much help I needed!!
On Sunday night I will be preaching on Discipleship and the Great Commission. I’ve invited friends from my church, my small group, from years past, from Perspectives, the Free Clinic and more. I’m excited to celebrate and worship God together with so many who have helped me to see more and more of Jesus through their lives.
The Holy Spirit also reminded me of a cool story about my mom and God’s call to serve Him in Harlem, NY, in the 1960’s. I think that will be fitting for Mother’s Day!
Finishing up at First Pres. I can hardly believe that in one week I’ll be finished at First Pres. I’ve got so much left to do, and I want to leave there well. I feel an urgency to get everything accomplished, and yet find myself unable to focus on tasks. Other things that need my attention keep crowding in, and so I start and stop one thing after another.
It’s also scary to contemplate being unemployed. Besides a few weeks in 1993 when I quit my job to get married and move from Michigan to South Carolina, I’ve been employed pretty much since the Monday after graduating college back in 1989. Knowing that now I truly am going to be a ‘faith missionary’ is kind of freaking me out.
And, speaking of being a missionary… I was turned down for life insurance “due to your occupation which includes foreign travel doing missionary work.” I’d be less bummed out if I hadn’t had to submit to a fasting blood test! I hate needles and the headache I got from not eating for several hours was just insult on top of injury!
Seriously, though, for me, as a single woman with no kids, it’s not that big of a deal. I worry for those considering entering the mission field who do have families! Truly, serving God means sacrifice and a lack of earthly security.
Opportunities to share. God has been so good and has opened so many opportunities for me to share all that He is doing. Along with lovely feedback from this blog (thank you, blogosphere friends!!) I was invited to share at another church’s Youth group and Missions committee. This Sunday I’ll share with one of my church’s Sunday School classes, and next week with our Presbyterian Women at their spring banquet.
What a joy to share our amazing God! He truly is the One who is providing for me. He will continue to provide in His way, in His time. I praise Him for allowing me to serve Him. I praise Him that even in the scary stuff, even in the struggles, He is at work. And… in the hard stuff, He is able to shine out His light.
I pray that when people see feeble, scared, broken me, they are pointed to Jesus. That in His strength and glory, even my fissures, cracks, jagged parts, can be used to reach out in His love. May my life be all for God, and for His glory alone!!