Celebrating a Life

Doña Gloria’s mom died nearly two weeks ago.  In the Catholic tradition here, the burial (with just the family present) was the next day, followed by nine days of going to church to pray for her soul. 

A couple of Doña Gloria’s sisters, as well as a cousin, have been staying with her during this time.  When I come home in the evening, they are usually sitting out on the front patio talking together. 

When they come home from church each night, Maria (Doña Gloria’s helper), makes coffee and then dinner for all of them.  It’s been a lot of work for her, and I’m hoping she’ll get a bit of a break soon!

The ninth and final day was this Tuesday.  In the tradition here, this is the day for the ‘public’ memorial service.  It was held in one of the Catholic churches in Jarabacoa.  Doña Gloria’s family is large, and her mom lived her entire life in the area (she was 94). 

The church was completely full.  I was able to understand nearly all of it, and it was obvious from all the comments that her mom was dearly loved. 

After the service everyone came back to our home, where there was plenty of food and coffee.  It’s spring, which means lots of rain, so people had to wade in through our muddy road to duck under the large rented tent in our driveway. 

Doña Gloria also hired extra help to make sure everyone was served.  As one of my friends here said, dying is expensive for families in the D.R. 

It’s not a big home, and every inch of it seemed filled with family and friends.  Although it was a sad occasion, it was also a joyous one, with people sharing happy memories of her mom, eating and drinking together.  And, from what I saw, no one was drinking alcohol, just lots of coffee.

Next week is Semana Santa (Holy Week).  I’m not sure yet what that will look like here in the D.R.  I do know that the schools are out for the week, and that many businesses shut down, too. 

I read on an English-language news site that there will be extra volunteer emergency workers, particularly near the beaches.  Apparently over the past four years 149 people have died during this week. 

Instead of being a week to reflect on Jesus’ sacrifice, ending with a celebration of His victory over death, lots of people seem to use it as an excuse to engage in all kinds of risky behavior – particularly all the dumb and dangerous decisions one makes when drunk.  Like what happens at Christmas, the Reason for the celebration seems to have gotten lost. 

Of course, it’s no different than back in the United States.  It’s no different than in my life.  Oh, I don’t plan to spend the week drinking rum and swimming in rip tides! 

But, I think of how the life of Doña Gloria’s mom has been remembered and celebrated.  How the family members have rearranged their schedules to make time to go to church and pray for nine straight days.  How they gathered together to mourn, but also celebrate, a life which impacted theirs in so many ways.      

I know if I asked, Doña Gloria would tell me all the sacrifice, time and money of the past two weeks was worth it.  That she’d have spent more of all of it to remember and celebrate her mom’s life.

It makes me stop and think.  How much do I value the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus?  Am I willing to rearrange my schedule, my life, to remember Him?  Am I willing to spend my time, energy, resources, to celebrate what His life has meant to me? 

In the midst of all my busyness and ‘to-do’ lists, it’s so easy for me to forget.  Oh, how I hate to have to admit that!  I praise God that even in my forgetfulness, my unfaithfulness, He is ever faithful.

Prone to wander, prone to forget, oh, how I feel it!  Renew in me today a willingness to remember, to mourn my sin, to celebrate Your sacrifice! 

Jesus, You did not count it cost, but poured Yourself out.  Teach me to do the same, for You alone are worthy of my schedule, my resources, my life, my all.

Challenges and Joy

This month has been a whirlwind.  Each week we’ve had new teams, which means meeting new young people, helping get them acclimated to the Site and El Callejon, sharing what we do, learning more about them, helping translate, answering questions, etc. 

Switching back and forth between English and Spanish gets confusing.  One day a couple of weeks ago I could not remember the English word for Mariposa (it’s Butterfly).  Another time when Daisy was speaking in English, I turned to our American team and said, “Bueno.  Ella dijo que… Umm, oops!” 

Today we’ll meet our fourth and final team.  We’ve got four high school girls this week.  It’s the first time since coming that I’ll be with all high school aged participants, which will be challenging, but also good, as most of the summer teams will be, too. 

Along with the work with the outreach participants is our continued work with the women, teens and girls of El Callejon.  As I shared on our Social Work site blog we’ve been facing a lot of challenges in this, too. 

All of this is, of course, what I came here to do.  Although I’m pretty tired, I’m also so thankful. 

Thankful to be working with Daisy, whose passion and love for Jesus and the people of El Callejon is an inspiration. 

Thankful that I have my little apartment (and Kindle!), a quiet(ish!) space to rest and unplug. 

Thankful for friends back home, praying for me, sending encouraging cards, emails, messages. 

Thankful for friends here, who are in various stages of the same transitions, feelings of loneliness, frustration, elation and peace (sometimes all in the same day… or hour!). 

Thankful, most of all, that God is inviting me to see more of His character, His love, His glory.  That by being here, I am learning things I could not have learned about Him back home.

Yesterday our sermon was on James 1:4-5.  Fernando (our SI doctor and also a gifted teacher) reminded us that instead of complaining about all our trials, we are to ask God for wisdom.  Wisdom to see that through them, our faith is being made mature and complete. 

This morning, Brian, our SI Director, also shared these verses.  He said, “And so, I’m rejoicing!”  You see, it’s not just the Social Work site that has been going through trials. 

Power stolen at two sites plus ours, vehicles breaking down, serious sickness… Every time we think we’re getting ahead of it, Wham! another trial. 

Do I see this as a way to grow my faith?  The truth is, most of the time, when I get so caught up in all I’m trying to do, I easily forget this.  I’ve got my plans, and when they don’t come to fruition, when there are roadblocks along the way, I quickly start to fret and whine.  Why, God, why? 

What would it look like if I would, instead, consider them ‘pure joy’ (James 1:2) and then ask for wisdom to see a glimpse of God’s greater purpose in allowing them.  That is my prayer for this new day, this new week, this new team.    

Disappointing Disciples

 “Don’t you know me, Philip, even after I have been among you such a long time?” (John 14:9)

Jesus is speaking to His disciples in the Upper Room.  He’s been with these men for three years.  They have been witness to miraculous healings, and profound teaching.  He has discipled them, sending them out in His power.  And all along, Jesus has revealed through His words and actions that He is the promised Messiah.

After all of that, they still sit in the upper room, confused by His words.

How would I have handled that exasperating, disappointing question?  I try to imagine being there, short hours from being tortured, killed, and torn from communion with my Father, confronted by Philip’s words.

Are you serious, Philip?!  What have you been doing the past three years?  Have you heard a word I’ve said?  Remember the blind men, the lame ones, feeding all those people, Lazarus?!  Big, big things are about to happen, and you’re telling me you still don’t get it?

But, though I read sorrow in Jesus words, He didn’t storm out of the upper room.  Instead, He used Philip’s question to talk more about His Father, and His relationship with Him.  He went on to describe the wonderful gift coming to them, the gift of the Holy Spirit.  Then, He prayed.  For them, for us, for Himself. 

I think of my response to the people of El Callejon who don’t ‘get it’.  In the past couple of weeks, we’ve been confronted by this again and again. 

Women who have been coming to our Site for years but still put their confidence in the lottery or forms of witchcraft.  Teens who have grown up hearing God’s Word, who know all the ‘right’ answers, but still choose to have unprotected sex and are now pregnant.  People who come for advice, ignore it, and then return, bemoaning how mixed up their lives are.

Are you serious?  Haven’t you been listening to a word we said?!

I think of my own life, and the stupid… no, let’s call them what they are… the sinful choices I sometimes (often!) make.  The times I doubt God, the times I trust more in my own strength than in the Holy Spirit’s power, the times I've asked Jesus questions just as disappointing as Philip's.

Are these any less evidence of someone who doesn’t ‘get it’?  Sure, my behavior may appear a lot 'better', but how often are my thoughts, my words, my attitudes disappointing for one who claims Christ?

I’m thankful that Jesus didn’t throw up His hands and march out on the disciples.  I’m thankful He continued to point them to Himself, to His Father.  I’m thankful He continued to be faithful to them by being faithful to His Father’s will, all the way to His death on a cross.

I pray that as we continue to cope with the brokenness, the frustrations and disappointments of El Callejon, we, too, will seek to be faithful to God’s call on our lives.  That we will love, not in our own power, not because of what another does or does not do, but love in response to what Christ has done for us. 

Thank you Father, for continuing to love me even as I disappoint again and again.  May I remember Your love, Your patience, Your plan and purpose, in my life, and in the lives of those You have allowed me to serve.

Ear Plugs

Ear plugs.  Last week I became the proud owner of several pairs of those amazing little cones of foam.  Roll and squish them, insert them (carefully!) into the ear, hold as they expand, and marvel as the music, roosters, dogs, people, recede.  Aaaaah!

Of course, the noises don’t completely go away, which is good!  I need to hear my alarm in the morning.  But, the ear plugs block enough sound to allow me to fall asleep, which, at night, is the most important thing for me to focus on!

When I worked in processing plants, ear plugs were a requirement.  Yes, they filtered out enough of the noise to protect our hearing, but another interesting thing happened.  While the ear plugs blocked out the majority of the sound, they also enabled us to speak – and be heard. 

Like with my alarm clock, ear plugs actually helped me be able to focus on the important noise, that of a conversation.

My life is very ‘noisy’ right now.  There is a constant ‘hum’ of noise where I live and work.  As I’m typing this, I can hear roosters, other birds, dogs, goats, insects, kids, adults, music, TV, trucks, motos, rain and wind. 

More than that, though, is the ‘noise’ of different voices and obligations.  This includes the women, teens and girls of El Callejon, the students and outreach participants, those donating to my ministry, my friends and family back home, my home church, Students International, the DR leadership, Daisy, myself…

All of these are important, all contribute to my life, my ministry.  But, how do I make certain that I don’t allow all of these voices to keep me from hearing the One who called me here, our Triune God?

How do I filter out all the noise so I can hear God’s voice?  How I wish there were a pair of ‘holy ear plugs’ to allow me to keep out the other sounds and voices – even my own thoughts!  In fact, my own thoughts are the hardest ones to silence! 

Perhaps some of you think that since I’m a missionary, it’s easy for me to wake up every day praising God.  After all, I’m on the ‘front lines’ in many ways, with the task and privilege of talking openly about Jesus each and every day.

The truth is I often wake up, not with thoughts turned to glorifying Him, but with a ‘to-do’ list immediately forming.  Like all the voices, it’s good, important stuff.  But… is it keeping me from hearing the only Voice that truly matters?

Oh, yeah, a pair of ‘holy ear plugs’ would be awesome!

Unfortunately, there is no simple and easy way to block out those other sounds.  Instead, I believe it is an act of my will, working in coordination with the Holy Spirit.  The apostle Paul talks about taking every thought captive (II Corinthians 10:5) to make it obedient to Christ.   

For me, the only way to learn how to block out all those noises is making a choice.  And not just once, but each and every morning.  A choice to either allow the needs of my day to quickly overwhelm me, or to take time away, praising God for His good gifts, spending time with Him, for no other purpose than to be in His glorious presence.

The only One who already knows what our day is going to hold invites us to capture our spinning thoughts, surrendering them to Christ.  He invites us to come away with Him for a time. 

Oh, friends, that’s far, far better than some bits of foam stuffed into our ears!  Let’s pray for each other as we strive to capture our thoughts, and then spend time listening to the Voice of the One who calls us Beloved.

Garcetas

Amigos:  Caballos (horses) y garcetas (egrets)

I first noticed it in the field across the street.  A white bird hanging out with a horse.  Aw, they’re friends.  How cute, I thought.  During the next weeks, I saw a lot more of these ‘friendships’.  In fact, it seemed that most of the time when I saw a horse – or cow – I’d see the bird, too.

Hitching a ride with a friend

I asked Maria what the white birds are called.  Garcetas.   In English, they’re Egrets.  They are bright white, with graceful wings.  They feed on the insects attracted to the bigger animals.  The horses and cows even allow them to catch a ride on their backs!

A few months back, I was running, and feeling pretty low.  Lonely, overwhelmed, just plain blah.  As I ran, I watched a garceta fly down and land near a horse in a nearby field.  It brought to mind the Holy Spirit descending on Jesus, on us. 

I praised God, humbled at this gift.  I was not alone at all.  Of course, when we keep our heads down, never glancing up, we can completely miss the evidence of His presence all around us.

Since that realization, I’ve noticed the garcetas showing up several times.  It seems that when I particularly need a reminder of the Holy Spirit’s presence, I see one of these birds.  

One day last month, I was walking back home from buying fruit.  I was sweaty and grumpy, replaying a less-than-great lesson with our difficult Pre-teens.  I had been all alone at the Site, nothing had gone well, and I was tired of it all. 

As I slid into a pity-party, I saw a horse with a garceta nearby.  Oh, wow, Father, forgive me.   I got so busy, focused soley on my task, I forgot that You are with me.  But, You are.  You are!

Where two or three are gathered...

Last week, as I stepped out for another full day, I saw two horses together with a garceta close by.  Immediately Jesus’ words jumped to mind, “Where two or three gather in My name, there I am with them.” (Matthew 18:20) 

At times it feels like we’re all alone in El Callejon.  But, Jesus is with us.  His Holy Spirit has come and made His home in us.  What a promise!  What reassurance!  Once again, I praised God for His gift.  For reminding me of His presence. 

And so, I’ve decided to ‘claim’ the garceta as a symbol of God’s work in me and through me here in the D.R. 

Thank you, Father, for this tangible, visible reminder of Your presence.  As I eagerly look for garcetas, I pray I continue to eagerly look for Your Holy Spirit, too.  Jesus, thank you that in You, I am never alone.  May I share this amazing truth with those who are in darkness, far from Your great love. 

Being UnReconciled

“How do you reconcile yourselves to the fact that Miguel is wearing the same clothes as yesterday?”  One of the outreach participants asked Daisy and I this yesterday.  I think we understood that her question really wasn’t just about one little boy’s outfit. 

After two days of being in El Callejon, of seeing the living conditions, of hearing some of the stories, her question was really How do you keep working in the midst of so much hopelessness?  It’s not an easy question… and a less easy answer.  It got me thinking about being reconciled.  Am I reconciled to it all?  Is Daisy? 

It’s difficult for those who come down to have to face so much, so quickly.  Stepping into El Callejon, all one’s senses are confronted, sometimes assaulted!  Sights, smells, sounds… and then when we start to share some of the stories, their feelings and thoughts are, as well.  A lot of it seems hopeless. 

Sure, a girl can do well in school, but then what?  What are her choices for her future?  To us, who are accustomed to being told we can do anything, be anyone, it’s hard to hear of how little the people of El Callejon can choose. 

I don’t like living in this tension.  I like feeling there are workable, tangible, ways we can fix things.  But, the more I ponder this, the more I try to look at Jesus’ life for my example, the more I have to come to the conclusion that my call is not to be reconciled. 

I think part of the problem with a lot of us who claim Christ is that we’re content.  We’ve been reconciled with God through Jesus, and since our personal tension is gone – that is, we know we’re not going to Hell anymore – our sense of discomfort has dulled. 

I know it sounds harsh, but I just don’t see a lot of examples in the Bible of people being saved and then settling back to ride out their lives until Heaven.

I think being uncomfortable, being ‘unreconciled’, is part of our call.  Jesus was born into a world filled with brokenness, hopelessness, muck and misery.  The truth is, when He ascended into Heaven, there was still plenty of that left.  He gave to us, His body, the Great Commission, to go out into the world, meeting the brokenness with His Good News. 

We like the fact that He’s reconciled us… but that’s only the beginning. 

I cannot reconcile myself to the misery around me.  That’s why I need to keep going back into it.  Not to become calloused, but to fight.  Yes, until Jesus returns, there will continue to be brokenness.  But, we are called to be a part of God’s Kingdom breaking into the darkness.  Not only for Heaven, but for right now, too. 

How did Jesus handle seeing so much pain and suffering?  How did He reconcile Himself to it all?  His work was to do what His Father had sent Him to do. 

That didn’t mean He didn’t weep outside of the tomb of Lazarus or when He saw the people of Jerusalem.  That didn’t mean He didn’t become angry at the Temple being used to hock trinkets. 

Jesus lived and worked within His Father’s will.  All He did was focused on that task.  He wasn't reconciled to the brokenness, but to understanding that His Father had a plan and a purpose for redeeming the world.  And, He was obedient to His part... which included profound pain and suffering.

Oh, ick.  None of us like this part, do we?  I sure don't!  But, separation from God is the destiny for those who do not accept Jesus' sacrifice for them.  Can we live comfortably, knowing so many will perish without His saving grace?

Friends, I don’t know your situation, but I know you do have a part in God’s work.  Get uncomfortable, get unreconciled. 

The truth is, outside of God's work, there is no reconciliation.  What an honor to be a part of it!  Isn't that worth a bit of tension, a bit of being unreconciled now, so more can enjoy eternity in complete reconciliation?  Isn't it?! 

I Can See You

Despite a night of interruptions (what WAS Lisa barking at last night at 1, 2 and 4?!) I woke up excited for the day.  Why?  Today is Sunday, which means worshiping at La Vid followed by yummy lunch with Doña Gloria. 
All good, but it was even more than that good stuff.  No, what had me so excited was the fact that the outreach team from JMU-IV was going to be at church. 

JMU is James Madison University, which just happens to be in Harrisonburg, VA, my hometown for the past 8 years.  One of the team leaders, Rachel, is a sweet, fun, and faith-filled ‘little sister’ in Christ.  In fact, she was part of our First Pres team who came down in 2010 and served at the Social Work site in El Callejon. 

One night on that trip, Rachel told me she needed to talk to me.  Okay.  No, she said, not yet.  I was a bit perplexed, but figured she’d talk to me when she was ready.  The next night, she told me, okay, now. 

And what she told me was this:  I have a spiritual gift of prophecy.  I can sometimes ‘see’ what a person should do, and when I tell them, it sometimes freaks them out.  But, I can see you living and working here.  If Students International offers you a job, I think you should take it.

She did kind of freak me out!  Not because I didn’t believe her, but because I did.  You see, the Spirit had been working on my heart during that trip, ever since I stepped foot back in El Callejon.  No, truthfully, He’d been at work long before that! 

But, to hear this college student, who I really didn’t know all that well, echoing what was going on in my soul… yeah, it was a bit freaky.  And, so, so amazing!

Obviously, SI did offer me the job.  Of course, It took work on my part, too.  I have to admit I get frustrated by those who sit and twiddle their thumbs waiting for THE SIGN that God has called them to this or that.  Yes, I believe God absolutely could choose to act with no help from us, but that doesn’t seem to be how He operates. 

After all, He’s already given us plenty of signs.  The Bible is filled with what He would have us do.  Sure, there aren’t specifics, but  I firmly believe that if we do what Jesus said, seeking Him first, keeping our focus on His Kingdom, we will be exactly where He wants us.  If we are faithful to Him, He will use us for His glory, in His way. 

But, we’ve got to do more than sit on our comfortable backsides.  Do you know Jesus?  Do you love Jesus?  Live for Him.  He’ll let you know… along the way.  Very honestly, as Christ followers, we don’t have the luxury of waiting around.  The needs of the world are big.  No, they are HUGE!  We each have a part, and I just don’t see much in the Bible that says our part is to sit to the side.

Sorry!  Stepping off my soapbox now!

My being here in the DR was a bunch of tiny steps, small affirmations.  One of those was Rachel’s prophetic word.  What a joy to see her this morning, and to worship our great God together!

Rachel & I after church.

Seeing Rachel and the JMU-IV team today was awesome.  The fact that these young people are spending their Spring Break here serving Jesus makes my heart sing. 

Sure, there are plenty of young people who will be spending this week serving only themselves, but it fills me with excitement and hope to see this tangible proof that the Holy Spirit is continuing to call up Kingdom workers. 

I'm looking forward to a week (actually a month!) of serving with those who have stepped out of their comfort zones to come and share Jesus here.  It's obviously not the only way to follow God's call.  I pray each of us will continue to seek Him, confident that in that seeking He will allow us to be a part of His amazing Kingdom work!  All glory to Him!!

Una Amiga

I have a friend!  Wow, that sounds a little pitiful, doesn’t it?  But, I have a friend, and it’s a happy thing! 

A few weeks back when I had the women do the “Heart” activity, writing difficult things in their lives, (the one where some of the older women kind of ‘fussed me out’), only one woman really seemed to get anything out of it.  

In fact, Angela stayed after, asking if I’d like to hear what she’d written.  That was the beginning, really, of our friendship. 

Angela is 38, and lives in El Callejon with her husband and three children (ages 10, 4 and 3).  She was raised near the community, and still has family in the area. 

When she was younger, she left for several years, trying to go to university in bigger cities.  She studied Teaching for a while but dropped out and began working.  She came back after a relationship ended and she lost her job. 

Angela seems to get along with the other women, although I’ve noticed some distance when the Adult Women’s group meets. 

Perhaps because she left, she doesn’t quite fit in anymore.  Maybe it’s because she’s had some further education.  Or, her desire that her children to do better, even if it means they leave El Callejon.  I’m not sure. 

I’ve pretty much always been drawn to ‘outsiders’.  To people who are different from the crowd.  Maybe it’s because I’ve spent most of my life a bit on the outside. 

Raised in Canada with American parents, a Canadian going to college in the US during the rah-rah 80’s, a white Yankee in African American and Hispanic processing plants in the South, and now una Americana living in the DR.

Angela and her daughter Angelina

Yesterday afternoon Angela came to the Site, and the two of us sat and talked for more than an hour, while her daughter, Angelina, colored.  It felt so good to be not constantly trying to think of topics of conversation.  We just talked.  Of course, at times I couldn’t understand what she was saying, but that’s okay, too!   

Angela asked me if I like living here, like what I do.  I have to say, I was surprised.  It was the first time anyone in El Callejon has asked me about my life, my feelings.  It was a gift to be able to share a bit about my struggles with getting used to things here.  To be myself. 

For me, that’s when a friendship really takes root.  When the conversation moves past surface pleasantries and goes deeper. 

I hadn’t realized how much I missed those connections.  Sure, I’ve got them with Daisy and other SI staff, and with outreach participants, too.  But, in the day to day work with the women of El Callejon, I was missing that. 

I pray this friendship will be a beginning.  That Angela and I can continue finding ways around language and culture barriers to connect.  And, that I’ll be able to connect with others in more significant ways, too. 

I have a friend.  Cool, eh?